


To be or not to be

by schrijverr



Category: The Mechanisms (Band)
Genre: Existential Crisis, Gen, Light Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, because I want to, brian is real, they bond, theyre PALS, ts is fake
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:54:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27945614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schrijverr/pseuds/schrijverr
Summary: Brian has an existential crisis about whether he is real, The Toy Soldier helps him. Later The Toy Soldier is questioning itself and goes to Brian, they find solance in the other.
Relationships: Drumbot Brian & The Toy Soldier (The Mechanisms)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 38





	To be or not to be

**Author's Note:**

> You can also find this work on my tumblr, which is @schrijverr as well. Hope you pop in and say hi, cause I'd love to talk to y'all!

Brian was panicking, he didn’t even know why he was panicking, but he was. Well that was a lie, he knew damn well why he was panicking, but the reason only made him panic more.

He had woken up to no sound.

It was very unusual for life on Aurora to be silent, so Brian had immediately become worried. He had hurried out of bed and to the common area, only to find multiple members up and running, shouting and shooting at each other. But he couldn't hear a thing.

The others had noticed him standing there, confused and panicked. They had asked him what was wrong. He had tried to explain, seeing them cringe and lean in as his volume switched between too hard and too soft according to their reactions.

They quickly figured out that a wire had disconnected in his sleep, something that was easily mended, but it left Brian with a sour taste in his mouth. Well, it would have if he’d had any taste buds, which he didn’t, because he was a robot. 

He wasn’t real.

And there it was, the real issue that was making him walk through the halls disorientated as he tried to calm down and not spiral. It wasn’t working out for him so far, though.

Brain was about to just sit down and curl into a ball when he ran into The Toy Soldier. It was whistling a tune as it marched, but it fell still when it saw Brian. It cocked its head to the side and asked: “Are You Quite Alright, Old Sport?”

“Yeah.” Brian tried weakly, unsure why he was even lying.

“I Am Not Sure That Is Correct, But I Do Not Think I Can Tell You Your Feelings Are Not Real.” TS replied.

“Maybe you just can, TS. After all why would I be real?” Brian sighed sadly.

The Toy Solider frowned, then carefully said: “I Might Be Understanding Your Tone Wrong, But You Seem Upset About That Fact.”

Brain scuffed his foot on the floor and looked down, before he shrugged: “I don’t know, you know? I feel I should be real, but then my body reminds me how not human I am and it freaks me out and then I wonder why I’m even trying to be real when I’m so obviously not. I mean, my morality is controlled by a little switch, who am I even fooling?”

“Not Being Real Isn’t The End Of The World.” The Toy Soldier said in an attempt to cheer him up.

He smiled and said: “I know that, TS. Sorry, if I made you feel like you not being real is dumb or something, I just want to be real, but I don’t feel like I am, you know?”

“I Do Not Feel, So You Didn’t, Do Not Worry.” The Toy Soldier assured him, “And You Are Quite Real.”

“Really? How do you know?” Brian asked, glad to have someone there to tell him that he wasn’t fake and he existed.

“Well, When I Feel Particularly Real, I Will List Things That Real People Do That I Don’t. You Do A Lot Of Real People Stuff.” The Toy Soldier explained.

“Can you tell me some of them, I kind of need that right now.” Brian told it.

“Of Course.” it replied cheerily, “Here Lets Sit.”

It sat down on the ground in the middle of the hallway, motioning Brian to follow its example. Brian shrugged and sat down next to it as he waited for it to start. It pretended the think for a moment, then began: “Well, For Starters You Sleep.”

“You don’t?” Brian couldn't help but asked confused.

“No, I Tried To Pretend A Few Times, But It Is Dreadfully Boring And I Can Use That Time For Much More Productive Things.” The Toy Soldier said.

“Oh, I didn’t know that.”

“That Is Because You Sleep Like A Real Person.” The Toy Soldier smiled, earning a small smile back, “Another Thing Is Your Eating.”

“I would hardly call drinking oil eating, TS.” Brian protested.

“It Is Something You Consume For Fuel To Keep Your Body Going, Correct?” TS asked.

“Well, yes, but-”

“Then I Do Not See How It Is Anything Different From Eating.” The Toy Soldier said firmly, “You Also Feel Pain, I Have Been Told That Is A Very Human And Real Experience.”

“You feel pain too, don’t you?” Brian asked.

“No, I Am Made Of Wood, There Is No Nervous System Running Through These Limbs, Old Sport.” The Toy Soldier smiled.

“But I heard you complain when Jonny stole your arm the other day.” Brian was still a bit confused about this new revelation.

“Just Because I Cannot Experience Pain, Does Not Mean It Is Not Uncomfortable To Function With A Limb Less.” TS explained.

Brian shrugged and made a ‘that’s-fair’-face. He had calmed considerably in comparison to earlier, his shoulders had relaxed and the fans in his chest weren’t working on overdrive to keep him cool and functioning anymore.

“Thank you, TS. I really needed that.” he smiled to the wooden soldier.

“No Problem, Old Sport. Here To Help.” The Toy Soldier saluted, standing up, helping Brian up as well, before it went on its merry way. 

After that life had continued with only to normal, minimal amount of existential crises from Brian and he was quite happy for it. He would replay parts of the conversation he’d had with The Toy Soldier to make him feel better about himself, which usually worked.

Then, about a week or so later, he got woken up in the middle of the night by a frowning TS. He knew it had stayed behind with Jonny and Ashes, who were playing cards and being mean to their own health, which was something for another day, but he had no clue why it would be here.

“What happened?” he therefore asked, groggily and confused.

“I Am Questioning My Fakeness And I Would Appreciate Input Of Someone Who Has More Understanding Of The Topic Than Ashes Or Jonny.” The Toy Soldier explained.

Immediately Brian was more awake, he sat upright and blinked the sleep away, before he asked: “What caused this?”

“Jonny Insulted Me And I Pretended To Be Upset, Before I Had Realized, I’d Done So. Now I Am Questioning If I Am Even Fake Or If I Am Faking My Fakeness.” it told him.

Brian thought about that for a moment. The Toy Soldier had been there for him during his identity crisis, so he would be there for it. Then he said: “That just means you’ve gotten good at acting, TS.”

“But It Was So Quick, Almost Like It Was A Response.” The Toy Soldier replied.

“Well, some actors start to become so used to playing their role, if they have for a while, that they start thinking and acting like that character, since they absorbed them so much. It is probably the same for you.” Brian reasoned.

“Isn’t That Different? They Already Have Emotions, Those Can Change.” TS tried to debunk Brians argument.

“No, no. You’ve been playing real for centuries now, some reactions were bound to become instinctive after so much time. It’s just a well trained reflex.” Brian was becoming more sure in his thoughts as he went on, “You aren’t about to fall over and sleep or eat or do other real stuff, right? It was just a reflex, like starting to walk when someone does, that doesn’t make you real.”

That seemed to cheer The Toy Soldier up as it chirped: “Thank You, Old Sport. You Are Quite Right, I Have Merely Mastered My Craft.”

“Yeah, you did.” Brian smiled, suppressing a yawn.

“Oh, Right. You Need Sleep. I Should Be Going.” TS said apologetically.

“It’s alright, TS. I don’t mind.” Brian said, but The Toy Soldier was already backing away, saying a quick thanks as it saluted before it disappeared out of the room.

And after that it had become a ritual for one or the other to appear whenever they were sad or not feeling like their reality fit.

Brian learned all the reason The Toy Soldier was fake because every difference made him real, while The Toy Soldier did it for the opposite reasons. And Brian was not going to lie, having TS use him as a case study of what real people did, was pretty fucking validating.

He didn’t know if the other had caught on to the new camaraderie between the two of them and frankly he didn’t care. The tea parties with inedible cookies and the late night talks about philosophy TS would back out of when it got too much by claiming it was something for real people and it was done pretending for the day, made life bearable.

It made life good.

TS could be fake and Brian could be real and both could exist together, because even though they were opposites, no one got it better than the other.

On the days when TS didn’t feel like pretending, it could be fake in Brians presence and he would make sure none of the others messed with it, while on days when reality felt beyond Brians grasp he could rant to it about being real or fake and it would listen and not complain about him making its head hurt.

It was nice, Brian decided, it was nice to be understood.

**Author's Note:**

> Brian drinks motor oil out of a cheesy mug and this has not stopped any of the others from stealing his drink, no you cannot change my mind on this.
> 
> I got this as a prompt from an anon, so I hope you liked it and sorry that I twisted it slightly! But u are so right about Brian and TS solidarity, it’s what they deserve.
> 
> For anyone else I do, do prompts, so you can send them over on my tumblr, which is also @schrijverr as mentioned at the start notes :D
> 
> Comments make my day and Kudos are amazing thank you so much for leaving any if you did!


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